The Statham Movie Generator

Every problem can be solved with a mysterious past, a black SUV, and violence.

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Statham Movie Generator Pictures presents in association with Black SUV Films a Shipping Container production a film by you starring a man with a mysterious past and a sweet old lady with forty-seven henchmen who should have known better music by a single brooding cello · edited by whoever was holding the shaky camera costume design one black jacket · stunts all of them written by an AI that takes this very seriously

A fan-made parody. Not affiliated with, endorsed by, or known to Jason Statham. Please don't tell him.